A book suggestion

"The man behind the wheel weighed, at a rough guess, twenty-two stone and appeared to be wearing a vehicle several sizes too small. Massive hairy arms protruded from a dirty singlet like legs of mutton through a slit in a wetsuit. The enormous gut landslided between the driver's legs like a ten-kilo bag of sagging wet shit and conveniently eclipsed any view Dean had of the wheel. The steering wheel in question nestled firmly between the driver's ample thighs, happy as a Frisbee in a waterbed and gripped by Bratwurst fingers. It resembled a bread and butter plate being stress-tested by a Sumo wrestler."

from "And Even the Rats Clapped" by David Argue. Excerpt describing a taxi driver

Things in my head

Million dollar idea: Scamp Camp! From Goofus to Gallant in six weeks. We take your little rapscallions and work some discipline into them. Activities include 4:00 reveille, breaking large rocks in to smaller ones, being put in small boxes, and crafts.

I am a superhero. My powers include correctly identifying cats as boy or girl based on their face, walking on ice without slipping, and forming regular-sized pieces of soap from small fragments.